My Life of What Ifs

Monday, April 26, 2010

Music Memory Monday - uncharted territory

My music memories are entering uncharted territory.  They are my memories, but they are from long ago important parts of my life and it can seem odd to post them here when I am happily married and in a very different place than I was 20 years ago.  But I guess that's the fun in all of this, and bloggers are bloggers for this very reason.  We have something to share, and apparently nothing to hide.

Slip Of The Tongue

A second chance

Four months before my highschool graduation I met my first real love. Not a crush, although I excelled at those, but a true connection that was like nothing I had ever experienced. We met through mutual friends and hit it off immediately and were soon spending every moment together. He was a year older and attending community college and therefore had fewer rules than I did, but we managed to sneak moments here and there. But my feelings were getting the best of me and the more intense we became the more I wanted to run. So, run I did. About 6 weeks after we began dating I went to Florida for Springbreak. A co-worker who I had been crushing on long before I met my boyfriend was staying at the same hotel and one thing led to another and when I returned from Florida I never called the boyfriend, and oddly enough he never called me either. I'm pretty sure he knew before I left for Florida that we were done.
Obviously, as one could have predicted things didn't work out with the co-worker crush. But I was ok, graduation was quickly approaching and the urgency to spend time with friends before we all headed in different directions was more than enough to fill my time. But as soon as the diploma was in my hand and summer was in full force I found myself thinking more and more about my ex. As I said, we had friends in common so it wasn't odd to hear what he was up to, luckily we never ran in to each other, until July.

I had been thinking a lot about our 6 weeks together, and rightfully so. During that time I had given him something I had been saving for almost 18 years, and I was pretty sure he didn't realize he was my first. Because I can't let things go, I had to write him so that he knew the full reason of why I freaked out and never called him again. Several of my friends were dating his friends so it wasn't hard to get the letter delivered. But I had guessed I would hear from him immediately and I didn't.

But July came around and the summer parties out in the farm fields of Jackson were in abundance and I finally ran into him. The minute we saw each other we were together again, talking and rehashing what had gone wrong in our brief time together. He apologized for not realizing the significance of what we shared and we talked, and talked, and talked, on the hood of my car.

It wasn't long after that we first heard Whitesnake's The Deeper The Love and declared it our song. Despite our age and the brevity of the first chapter in our relationship, we found our way back to each other. And despite what we had put each other through we felt that we were better for it.

An the deeper the love
The stronger the emotion,
An the stronger the love
The deeper the devotion

We were good together for almost another 2 years, but alas my young heart needed to see what else was out there and I let him go, but he holds a place in my heart that is tied to so many firsts, and when I hear this song I am reminded of some very special times in my life.

1 comment:

Abbey said...

I love Whitesnake. I remember some moments like that. What a great story, thanks for sharing.