My Life of What Ifs

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Parenthood is stressful

I am a bad mother.

I started off this journey as a REALLY bad mother.  Now, I am just bad.  Singular.  Most days.

When Ryann was four months old we took her to San Diego for my brother's Navy BUDs graduation.  We were first time parents, and she was pretty much just a lump we carried from place to place that other people wanted to hold.

The morning of our last day as we packed to go home, Ryann threw up.  Then she squirted out.  Then she threw up and squirted out at the same time.  Clearly the child was ill.  Or possessed, as a new Mom I wasn't so sure.  And frankly, all I could think about was that we were in San Diego and we had to fly to Detroit.  With her, and all her... projecting.

On our way to the airport, and after we "borrowed" a number of towels from the hotel (most of which I still have and yes, I think of that day every time I wash) we had to stop for some Pedialyte.  'Cause that's what good mothers give their sick, squirting babies.  Cory stopped the car, I went in and came out with the goods and off we went.

Now I should tell you- all of this happened in January of 2001.  Months before planes were flown into buildings and I felt like an even badder mother for bringing a child into this world.  I share this time stamp with you because after we checked our luggage and approached the check in counter with our stroller and very pale infant I realized something.  I could not find my drivers license.  MY BABY IS SICK AND I HAVE NO I.D.!!!!  They aren't going to let me fly home with her!!!!  Hmmm, wait a minute.... NO!  I never thought of that!!!  At least not for long.

Anywho... I approached the counter sobbing.  "I am a new Mom and my baby is sick and we just wanna go hooooomeee!"  People were staring.  "I lost my drivers license when I stopped to buy Pedialyyyyyttttteeeeee!"

Yes, this much I had discovered.  Rewind to the parking lot of the store... Cory drops me off, I go in, Cory moves to a new location in the parking lot, and I get back in.  If Cory had not moved the car, I probably would have seen the best drivers license picture I have ever taken lying on the ground.  But no, I had no idea and off I went.

Again, in present time I would have never gotten on that plane without my I.D.  But in the pre-terrorist era, the counter lady took pity on me and my dear sweet child, and my husband who was clearly in the doghouse, and let us fly home.  With our baby.  With the Pedialyte.

So you can see, I am a normal bad Mom.  But I knew what I had to have for my sick baby, and I went and got it.  Had I been home I would have still had to run to the store, because we could never keep Pedialyte on hand to hydrate our dehydrated children because it expired before you could use it. 

Not anymore!  Now you can buy Pedialyte Singles in a 4 pack of juice box size drinks.  Great for kids, great for bad Moms, and they have an 18 month shelf life.  Rock on.

Visit the Pedialyte website for many valuable resources and to help you find new Pedialyte Singles at a store near you.

Disclosure:  I was compensated by Collective Bias for my time and this post.  All opinions and view are my own.

Wendy's Gift Card Winner

The winner of the Wendy's gift card is comment #.....

Here are your random numbers:


Timestamp: 2010-10-26 18:08:02 UTC

Mami2jcn said...
I like you on Facebook under the name Mary Happymommy.
mami2jcn at gmail dot com
October 19, 2010 10:20 AM

Thank you Mami2jcn, or Mary Happmommy and Congrats!

Friday, October 22, 2010

A ship without a sail, boobs without a bra

I've been feeling a little blah lately.  I don't think my health is the greatest, and my weight has crept up and for the first time ever I can feel it effecting my everyday life.  I don't like it.

It took a lot for me to admit that to myself.  It's taking a lot for me to admit it here.  And when I tried to have a conversation with my husband about it, well I guess it was the wrong time and his response was to rattle off World Series stats.  OK, so my timing wasn't great, but he had just turned the TV on.  Just.  It's not like he had watched every minute of every game.

Of course, and really, I don't like to air my dirty laundry here, but sometimes.... well, I don't think I'm heard around here much.  Maybe it's martyr syndrome, but I do a lot.  I handle a multitude of actual paying "jobs".  I volunteer at my girls' school, we run the concession stand for the soccer club, I am a co-leader of one daughter's Girl Scout troop and leader for the other.  I do a lot.  But I don't think the other three people who live in this house agree.

My six-year-old seems to always point out the things she feels I don't do. Such as, make her dinner.  Because apparently when you make someone dinner and they wait 45 minutes to sit down, then decide they don't like it, and you won't make them anything else?  That means you never make them dinner.

I want to be heard.  I want someones full attention.  I don't want to be asked when I am going to pay the Verizon bill.  It makes me defensive.  I've tried to hand off the family finances and yet I am still in charge, so don't ask me those questions, with that tone.  Yes, that tone.  Well, I hear a tone.

I want to be told I am doing a good job.  I want to hear, "It's such a relief to have YOU take care of ALL of this.  Thank you for alleviating my stress."

I guess I am just selfish.  Perhaps needy.  Maybe I really am just brat.  Or maybe when I squeeze you tight because I am overwhelmed with love, I just want to be squeezed back.

All that, and physically I feel like crap too.  Happy Friday.

Monday, October 18, 2010

Music Memory Monday

Probably not my juiciest Music Memory, but it's still an important one :)

Over The Edge

My last semester at college I created and co-produced a TV show called Over the Edge for our college TV station. It was a segmented show where we would try to cover some campus news, nightlife, and any other oddity that someone suggested.

Blues TravelerOne of our biggest challenges as we put the first show together was "What should our theme song be?" In 1996, TV shows still had opening credits and I wanted Over the Edge to have the perfect theme song. We had considered a number of options before my co-producer put something together using But Anyway by Blues Traveler. I liked Blues Traveler, but I was more of a mainstream Blues Traveler fan. Everyone liked them when Hook came out, but this was a song off of an earlier album. The minute I heard it I knew it was the right song, even the lyrics seemed appropriate for a college TV show.

Now, whenever I hear the harmonica at the beginning of But Anyway I think of Over The Edge. The funny part is that clearing music for advertising is an integral part of what I do everyday. I had no idea how illegal using that song, and all songs, without permission was at that time. I guess we're just lucky that Blues Traveler never came after us for royalty payments.  Meh, but anyway...

I tried the new Wendy's Pick 2 menu and you can too!!! GIVEAWAY!

Last week I was invited to an awesome luncheon at the Wendy's on Northwestern Hwy in Southfield.  A bunch of us Michigan Bloggers all gathered together to try out the new Wendy's Pick 2 menu.  We had a great time getting to know each other and talking about this great opportunity to try something new.

There are 28 different combinations you can walk away with with this new menu.  For me, I opted for a half BLT Cobb Salad with Avocado Ranch dressing and a baked potato.  My dear friends Tonya and Amy who attended with me, went with the Apple Pecan salad and they both said it was fantastic.  One complimented their salad with a baked potato and one with a side of chili.  Isn't this fun?

It was a great opportunity to see the faces behind the words and avatars I have been following for some time now, and I hope we meet up again soon.

Here's a pic of the whole group, I am the floating head third from the right. :)

I have an awesome opportunity for a lucky reader to try the new Wendy's Pick 2 menu as well.  I am giving away a Wendy's gift card and you can enter two ways:
  1. "Like" My Life of What Ifs on Facebook, then return here and leave a comment telling me you did so!
  2. Leave another comment telling me what your Wendy's Pick 2 combo would look like.
If you only want to enter once then you can combine the above actions.  If you already "Like" MLWI just leave me a comment saying that you're a MLWI Liking Pioneer!!!!  Just kidding.  Kind of.

One winner will receive a $7 Wendy's gift card to purchase your own Pick 2 Combo.  It's a beautiful thing.  Right?

See more of our lunch in my whrrl story below!

More check-ins at Wendy's
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Contest runs through 11:59 p.m. on Sunday, October 24,2010.  Only residents of U.S. and Canada may enter, and must be 18 or older to win.

Disclosure:  I am working with TheMotherhood and Wendy's, and they purchased my lunch, provided a giveaway and have compensated me for my time.  However, all opinions expressed in this post are my own.

Say Boo to the Flu Winners!!!!!

It's time to announce the two Say Boo to the Fly contest winners!!! Each recipient will receive a flu prevention gift basket (with Clorox hand sanitizer, disinfecting wipes, a $25 Target gift card, a trick-or-treat bag with goodies like Silly Bandz, etc).

The two winners per are......
Random Integer Generator
Here are your random numbers:
Timestamp: 2010-10-18 15:02:49 UTC

Comment # 10 is....
js22 said...
I pledged. Hope someone has cheap flu shots!
Thanks for the giveaway!
email in blogger profile.
October 17, 2010 2:16 PM

and comment #6 is...
took the pledge
October 9, 2010 7:23 PM

Thanks so much everyone for entering!!!!!

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

It's only just begun

I am the mother of two daughters, one 10 and one six-and-a-half.

The one whines about everything.  The first words out of her mouth every morning are sung, but the music is more nails on chalkboard than birds singing.  It's horribly unpleasant.  Horrible.

Oh, did I mention that it's the six-year-old I'm talking about?

The one that's too smart for her own good, and basically tells me that.  The one that lost her two front teeth on Friday, but doesn't mind that I call her "Fangs".  The that loves her big sister and then whines that Ryann is just like Mama!!!  I think it's because we both use the phrase "Whiny Brat" to describe her.  I know.  Horrible.

The older one has hormones.  I can see them floating above her head.  A constant reminder of my younger days and how I just didn't want to talk about it!  Geesh!  She gets overwhelmed and confused.  Sometimes she's Mama's baby as she rolls her bean-pole-self up on my lap and wraps her almost size seven feet around mine.  And then she's the tween, unsure of herself and her feelings, and eyeing the neighbor boy with a gleam in her eye.

I wanted two boys.  I said that out loud.  But I have two girls, that someday will be 16 and 13.  Simultaneously.  I love them, but pray for me.  Please.

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Oh yes, I said "Boo" to the flu!

This last Saturday, I was one of the mean ones.  The ones that drag their kids to a Halloween themed flu clinics and force them to dress up and take candy from strangers.  Someone call the cops.

OK, so it wasn't bad at all.  In fact, due to some unforeseen circumstances I was the only one who made a date with a needle, but fear not young daughters-o-mine!  You will be visiting the pediatrician's office before you know it!

On Saturday, my girls and I, along with Melissa from Rock and Drool, and Amy from Coffee with the Mrs., attended "Say 'Boo!' to the Flu" at Alliance Mobile Health in Troy.  We were invited by our new friends at the Visiting Nurses Association of Southeast Michigan (VNA), Families Fighting Flu, and The Clorox Company who want everyone to know the dangers of influenza, and that vaccinations are available.

The cool thing about the VNA is that they are a non-profit organization and if you stop at one of their clinics for your flu shot, all proceeds go back into the community to help provide home health care and hospice services to the uninsured.

Saturday's event had a nice steady turnout which pleased Alexandra Hichel, Senior Communications Consultant for VNA, "This is a big community event and the theme distracts a lot from the agony of the flu shot."

The events are designed to encourage families to keep themselves and the children protected. And for those wondering H1N1 is one of three strains in this years' vaccine.

One of the scariest truths about influenza is that it can kill healthy children of all ages. Parents like Detroit area resident Zack Yaksich know the heartbreak only too well after his 5-year-old daughter died suddenly of influenza complications in 2003.  You can read Zack's story by visiting Alana's Flu Foundation.

There are two more "Say 'Boo!'" events planned by the VNA this month:
• Saturday, October 16, 2010, from 9 a.m. to 1 p.m., at the North Oakland YMCA (3378 E. Walton Blvd.) in Auburn Hills
• Friday, October 29, 2010, from 4 to 7 p.m., at Ultimate Soccer Arenas (867 South Boulevard) in Pontiac

People can also come to the VNA Oak Park office Monday through Friday from 9 a.m. to 1 p.m. to get their flu shots or visit them at our many other public clinics.

“Vaccination is a key step in helping fight the flu,” said Kay Renny, RN, manager of community programs for VNA.  “According to the CDC, the flu vaccine can prevent as many as two-thirds of influenza infections in young children, with even higher estimates for older children.”

And DON'T FORGET!!!!!  There is still time to take the pledge to "Say 'Boo!' to the Flu!"  By taking the pledge to vaccinate your family against influenza you enter to win some awesome prizes.  You can also visit my post here, and leave me a comment stating that you took the pledge and be entered to win one of two awesome flu prevention gift baskets (with Clorox hand sanitizer, disinfecting wipes, a $25 Target gift card, a trick-or-treat bag with goodies like Silly Bandz, etc).  You can enter through 11:59 p.m. on October 17!

So take the pledge!  Enter all the contests including this one and this one!  Check out my whrrl below!  And take care of yourselves!  Peace out. Boo!

More check-ins at Alliance Mobile Health
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Disclosure:  I am working with TheMotherhood and The Clorox Company, and they have compensated me for my time.  However, all opinions expressed in this post are my own.

Monday, October 11, 2010

Music Memory Monday

It's seems I have two fans of my Music Memory Monday stories, so I dedicate this one to them ;)


"What are you doing here?" he asked.

"Well...I...heard there was a party and we thought we'd come out and see everyone."

"Where's your boyfriend?"

"He's out of town this weekend, I came out with T and J."

"It's been awhile."


Pure Country [Original Motion Picture Soundtrack]We had broken up about a year and a half earlier after two years together.

Our break-up was long, and dramatic. I had basically ended it with him to be with my current boyfriend, but he was my first, in so many ways.

It was odd to see him again, even though I had been drinking and looked forward to running in to him here where he lived with a few other guys from "the group". The group I had also belonged to until I did the unthinkable and let him go. My current boyfriend had gone out of town with some friends and this was my payback to him. I was young, and yeah- immature, but so were many others at that age.

We had started the evening around the bonfire. It was a familiar site. Open field, bonfire, lots of drinking. He invited me inside to warm up and with glaring eyes from my friends I accepted the offer. We sat on his bedroom floor and talked, really talked. The animosity he had towards me after our breakup was gone, he had moved on now. But we both needed to say some things. He pulled a shoebox out of his closet with our two years wrapped up inside. Half used candles, cards, my senior picture, why he had kept these things I don't know. I had a similar box but wasn't that a girl thing to do?

"I was saving you know," he said.

"Saving for what?"

"The football bank was for you, every penny I put in there was for your Marquis."

He remembered what kind of ring I wanted, wow.

"Yeah, but we just weren't meant to be." I said.

"I know, but I wanted you to know that I was serious at the time."

We chatted a lot longer. Saying all the things we had wanted to say, I guess. He said he wasn't giving my senior picture back even though he admitted if his girlfriend found it she would throw it out. There were some moments where kissing him would have been so easy, so familiar, but the alcohol was wearing off and I knew it would open a door that was better left closed.

"Have you seen 'Pure Country'?" he asked me.

"That George Strait movie?"

His family owned a horse farm and they were as country as you could get in Michigan. I hadn't seen the movie.

"No, I haven't. Is it good?"

"Borrow mine. I think you'll like it."

"But how will I get it back to you? I have no idea when I'll see you again."

"You'll get it to me someday, but hey, pay attention to the song called 'Where the Sidewalk Ends'."

"OK, why?"

"'Cuz it's about us"

Friday, October 8, 2010

Don't forget to say Boo to the Flu AND WIN!!!!!

Don't forget about the Say Boo to the Flu event in Troy on Saturday.

Fox News Detroit even did a segment about this great event!

And now, to add a cherry to the top I am offering a super cool Say Boo to the Flu giveaway!!!!

Just visit the Say Boo to the Flu website and take the pledge to vaccinate your family against the flu.

Once you take the pledge come back to My Life of What Ifs and leave me a comment!  Two lucky commenters, chosen at random, will each win a flu prevention gift basket (with Clorox hand sanitizer, disinfecting wipes, a $25 Target gift card, a trick-or-treat bag with goodies like Silly Bandz, etc).
So take the pledge!!!!!  This is an awesome event!

Winners must be in the U.S. and 18 years of age or older.

Disclosure:  I am working with TheMotherhood and The Clorox Company, and they have compensated me for my time.  However, all opinions expressed in this post are my own.

Monday, October 4, 2010

Say Boo to the Flu (i.e. Creepy crud, death-warmed-over, virus, snot, yuck!)

So I'll get right to the point.  Do you get flu shots for yourself and/or your children?

I did for many years for myself.  Every year since I was had Ryann in 2000.  Then I would have the girls get them too.  Until last year, when their pediatrician didn't have the flu shot clinic and I caved to the girls whining "we don't want to get a shot!"

This year I am taking the girls to "Say Boo To The Flu" at Alliance Mobile Health in Troy.  It's a Halloween-themed flu shot clinic, and what better way to fight off the flu shot worries than to dress up for the process?

Families Fighting Flu, Visiting Nurse Associations of America and The Clorox Company have teamed up to help you keep your family protected from the flu.   Detroit-area residents are invited to educate (and vaccinate) about flu prevention from noon until 4:30 p.m. on Saturday, October 9 at 2045 Austin Dr. in Troy.

You can also take the "Say Boo to the Flu" pledge and be entered to win some awesome prizes including an AMAZING sweepstakes to win a trip for four to The Wizarding World of Harry Potter in Orlando!!

So join me, Melissa from Rock and Drool, and Amy from Coffee with the Mrs. at "Say Boo to the Flu"!

The cost for the flu shot is $25 – and at least 24 free flu shots will be available. FluMist is $30 and pneumonia shots are $50. VNA is able to bill the following insurances: Blue Care Network, Medicare, HAP, Health Plus of Michigan and Priority Health. VNA also accepts cash; checks should be made payable to VNHSS.

P.S.  If you hear two girls, one six and one 10, screaming from afar at this event it's because they still hate me for making them get a shot.  Candy involved or not.

Disclosure:  I am working with TheMotherhood and The Clorox Company, and they have compensated me for my time.  However, all opinions expressed in this post are my own.