My Life of What Ifs

Sunday, March 29, 2009

Cryptic Enigma

(This is a totally weird post. Don't ask questions, not knowing is good... )

I've OD'd on nostalgia. I've been dumped by the past. It's time to purge for the sake of my mind, body and soul. So ladies and gentlemen I give you the word hurl... the melody retch... the lyric upchuck.

There were times I almost let you go, when I thought I needed to break free.

It's not what you got, it's what you give. It ain't the life you choose, it's the life you live.

Where the sidewalk ends and the road begins, we said goodbye on a cold dark night. I'm not afraid to go, you bet I'm not. Where the sidewalk ends you left a lot.

The broken locks were a warning you got inside my head. I tried my best to be guarded, I'm an open book instead.

Took a long walk after midnight trying to make sense of it all. Tried to catch a glimpse of my old life but your face was all I saw.

When it's good, then it's good, it's so good 'till it goes bad. 'Til you try to find the you that you once had.

I love you. I've loved you all along. I miss you. Been far away for far too long.

Have you ever hated yourself for staring at the phone? Your whole life waiting on the ring to prove you’re not alone.

Someone swears his true love until the end of time. Another runs away, separate or united, healthy or insane. And to be yourself is all that you can do.

Your eyes were red, mine painted black. My thin blue dress, slid down my back. You held me close and you cried cried cried, cause we both knew I wasn’t coming back.

Oh I've felt that fire and I've been burned, but I wouldn't trade the pain for what I've learned. I wouldn't trade the pain for what I've learned.

All that I am. All that I ever was. Is here in your perfect eyes they're all I can see. I don't know where, confused about how as well, just know that these things will never change for us at all.

You shimmy-shook my soul, leaving me stranded all in love on my own. Do you think of me, where am I now?

Should I let it start again? Open up the book and read it. I will show you what I can, show you I can be the best of men. Just don’t break my heart, just don’t break my heart, ‘Cause it’s the only one I’ve got.

And we know it's never simple, never easy. Never a clean break, no one here to save me. You're the only thing I know like the back of my hand. And I can't breathe without you, but I have to.

You have been mine since time untold. Our love is immortal, don't you know. Others will come, and they will go. But I loved you young, and I'll love you old.

It's all your fault, you called me beautiful. You turned me out and now I can't turn back. I hold my breath, because you were perfect. But I'm running out of air and it's not fair.

Still you're my best friend, and after a good, good drunk. You and me wake up and make love after a deep sleep where I was dreaming, I was dreaming of a Dreamgirl.

We're strange allies, with warring hearts, what a wild-eyed beast you be. The Space Between the wicked lies we tell, and hope to keep us safe from the pain.

Don't forget my broken heart, you remember it from the start. You made it and it's all a part, of your grey blue eyes.

Lost and insecure, you found me, you found me. Lying on the floor, surrounded, surrounded.

How many times can I break til I shatter? Over the line, can't define what I'm after, I always turn the car around. All that I feel is the realness I'm faking, taking my time but its time that I'm wasting. I always turn the car around.

There's an emptiness inside her and she'll do anything to fill it in. And though it's red blood bleeding from her now, it's more like cold blue ice in her heart. She feels like kicking out all the windows and setting fire to this life. She could change everything about her, using colors bold and bright. But all the colors mix together - to grey, and it breaks her heart.

There's always one that gets away. The one that sneaks up on you that slips away. In a closed off corner of my heart, yes I'll always see your face, the one that got away.

I miss the sound of your voice, loudest thing in my head, and I ache to remember all the violent, sweet, perfect words that you said.

Nobody knows, nobody sees. Nobody knows but me.

You see the smile that's on my mouth. It's hiding the words that don't come out. All of the friends who think that I'm blessed. They don't know that my head is a mess.

This is our last goodbye. I hate to feel the love between us die, but it's over. Just hear this and then I'll go. You gave me more to live for, more than you'll ever know.

Plus, for reading this far, my favorite Post Secret postcard of the week....

And finally, the awesome valentine created by Joel Holland that appeared in Ready Made magazine in the February/March issue...

I consider myself cleansed :)

No comments: